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Plight of a Faerie Revised by =osyris:iconosyris:



It was summer and a cool sea breeze quenched the heat of the ever-present sun. A young man with fair tanning skin, dressed in khaki shorts below the knees, a white tank top, and leather sandals, strolled through the western costal countryside of England. His eyes were blue, hair red, and smile bright. He came upon a small fishing village surrounding a cove. There, he visited the waterfront market and bought an apple before moving on. As he ate, something caught his eye in the grass near a fountain, which sat in an open yard to his right. The man stopped and cocked his head as he took another bite. Intrigued, he approached the fountain and put the apple away.

Squatting down, he saw something unbelievable: a female faerie. She sat near the ground on a leaf of a tall plant with small blue bell-shaped flowers. The man was baffled as to why she merely sat there, but a closer inspection revealed why. A chain was attached to an anklet around her left leg and clipped to a rusted metal post with a donut-shaped head and her Monarch-like wings had been torn away, leaving only tattered stubs. The petite naked faerie had light brown hair that sadly drooped around her pale tear-stained face and partly covered her breasts. Her green eyes were bloodshot from crying and she wore a look of hopelessness and betrayal.

She did not notice him at first, though her eyes were always towards him. When she did, her expression remained as she took measure of him. Once done, the faerie returned to her vacant stare. With a heavy sigh, the young man scooped the post and plant between his right ring and middle fingers and gently pulled them from the ground, taking the faerie in hand. Unprepared for this, she rolled back into his palm. He could feel her tremble in fear as she quickly curled into a ball. With a reassuring smile, the man revealed a pair of tweezers and began to unhinge the anklet. After a silent moment, the faerie uncovered her face. Only then did she notice her bond was gone.

Confusion turned to elation as tears of joy ran down her face. The man simply smiled and offered his left hand to her. Cautiously, she stood up and walked over. He then dumped the chain and post before kneeling down to replant the flowers. Standing up, he placed her on his right shoulder and returned to the road. In short order, they reached the meadows beyond the town. There he held out his hands and offered her freedom but she was content to stay on his shoulder. The man then took out the apple and offered her a piece. She gratefully ate it and soon fell asleep with a pleasant smile. With a sigh and a chuckle, the young man finished his apple and continued his stroll, now not so alone.
©2007-2009 =osyris
:iconosyris:

Author's Comments

A newer version of this story can be found here: Will-o'-the-Wisp 01.

plz don't hurt me any more by *pandabaka was the inspiration for this short three page story. What are their names? Don't know. Will you see them again? Who knows. It's just a short story.

Big HUGE edit!!

Well, I didn't like how I wrote this so I went through and made some major changes. There is not no dialog and and a much simpler storyline. In fact, at only 489 words, this makes for a much better story. I hope you all will agree (for those who have read the previous version). I think I will do more with these two. We'll see.

Guess I did. Click the link!


Song of a Faerie

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:iconsunnybrook1:
:nod: Not bad, not bad... I like the scene that the fairy deviation inspired. The style of describing the setting and characters reminds me of a friend of mine who is studying film - the way that scripts are written is similar to this.

It is efficient, and works well for getting as much info about the scene as possible (only film majors can't include anything that describes what a character is thinking - only what you see and hear, actions and dialogue) but it doesn't seem like a story. It mimics the deviation quite accurately, but it's missing some of the things that draw me, personally, into a fireside tale - a pace and flow hinged less on 'facts' and more on thought-like realizations, curious events and reactions, and characters we feel we've taken a part in discovering.

It has potential, and looks to have been fun to get out and write, but overall it could be so much more! :plotting:

Sorry, but I get kind of excited as I think about what this could become - would you mind if I had a go at it, based on what you've written? Citing the original concept to you and =pandabaka , of course...

--
Why is it that human beings do best within some kind of order and rules? :confused:
:iconosyris:
My original goal was to tell a story but I didn't like what I had so I revised it to its current state. I took the idea of trying to make a short story in under 500 words. The other two stories that continue this plot are in a similar format. While such was my original goal, I have found as you have said that it is more summarizes I am producing. I already have my Tales of Miw series growing into something big as I finally know where I want to go with the story. I wanted to try my hand with under 500 word after reading a DD in such a format. But I think I must concede to my failure and try to spell them out in a full story. While they are not the epic I've been wanting, I think both have potential, especially since both are original. (ToM has more issues since I've included 5 fan-fics and only have 5 truly original works. I'm thinking of reworking as many as I can to keep them or just chucking them all together.) I really want to see where this Faerie series goes and think it might be time to look at these as my first stories.

As to your request: I don't see a reason why not, since I know you'll do as you say. It's nice to be the source of inspiration for once. I will more than likely make my own expanded version. The one thing I've avoiding tacking in many of my stories in inner thought. This might be the time to explore that...or just have Arthur talk to himself. Thanks for the motivation. It will be interesting to see how we interpret this work.

--
"I am neither an angel nor a demon. I am a human."
-Russell B.
:iconsunnybrook1:
Ah, that makes sense - it's mind-boggling, frustrating, but very useful to write with restrictions and within limits.

And thank you, I can't wait to start! (but first, sleeeeeeeep..... :sleep: )

--
Why is it that human beings do best within some kind of order and rules? :confused:
:iconosyris:
Tell me about it. I'm at school right now! :XD: I'm a Husky now! :O

--
"I am neither an angel nor a demon. I am a human."
-Russell B.

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September 8, 2007
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